Single in the ‘Ville: What Nashville’s Black Bachelors are Looking for in a Relationship

By The Editorial Board

In anticipation of the upcoming Ladies Night, which will bring together single women in Nashville for an evening of discussions over complimentary food and wine on February 13th, the Nashville Voice has begun a series of articles tackling the perils of contemporary dating head-on. As a follow-up to our article entitled For Black Women, Singleness is a Complicated Issue, The  Nashville Voice sat down with a group of four bachelors at Slim & Husky’s to talk about dating and relationships. We have included selected responses here.

Demarcus, 24, who recently graduated from Tennessee State University, is looking for loyalty and compassion and admits he has a “preference to date Black women.” The college grad places an emphasis on establishing a healthy relationship, but admits it can be “hard to locate spaces where like-minded individuals may be.” Aaron, a Fisk University senior echoed Demarcus’ preference for Black women, and expressed that Nashville’s growing college-aged population makes meeting women easier, although he prefers casual hook-ups over formal dates. Aaron also mentioned that out of all of his colleagues at work, many of them Black men, he is the only one interested in dating Black women.

Andre, a 42-year-old divorcee who attended Tennessee State University but never graduated is looking for a second shot at love in Nashville. “I only date Black women,” he says, “but whenever I go on a date, the woman always brings up her ring size. I want to get married eventually, but I don’t want to rush into it. I’ve been divorced before and want my next marriage to be my last, so I have to make sure I’ve found the right one.”Andre says he’s a man of faith looking to build first before marriage and has encountered women with whom he is “unequally yoked.” “Not that I’m a dictator but believe man is the head of household.” Andre says this sometimes makes dating complicated, and that he is looking for shared values “without a whole lotta drama,” and wants to find someone “with their stuff together.”

Ryan, 34, is a graduate of UT Knoxville and has never been married, but hopes to find someone he can settle down with. He’s dated outside of race in the past, and remains open to the prospect of interracial dating in the future. “I’m just open to love,” he says. “I feel like connectivity is more important than being exclusive to one race or another. Compatibility is more important.”

Demarcus, Aaron, and Ryan all said that having children is important to them, but that they aren’t ready to start a family yet. Andre expressed how important his two children are to him.

On Thursday February 13th, single women are invited to come together for a discussion about relationships and dating prospects in Nashville over complimentary food and wine. Kimberly Vaughan, motivational speaker and author of the book Too Much, Too Fast, will host the event, which will take place from 5:30pm to 7:30 pm at The Lab on Jefferson Street.

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